10-28/Swish and Spit

Before we headed to Pittsburgh, I attended my first wine tasting event last Thursday. It was held at the Atlantis Aquarium in Riverhead on the edge of Long Island. All I wanted to do was wear a suit jacket, so I was in.

When you arrived into the main area, a classy lounge band was playing the "Girl From Ipanema." Around the hall, there were cheese spreads strategically located and catering personnel were walking around with different hors d'oeuvres. All the Long Island Wineries set up tables where you could taste, and even purchase some of the wine.

I became quite excited once I saw the personnel walking around with these delicious bite size vittles, but quickly became disappointed when I started to notice most of them were fish related. It's a bit embarrassing when you start flagging down these folks, only to dismiss them when they tell you that it's shrimp delight or shrimp medley.

At one point I did spot pigs in a blanket, but I couldn't track her down quick enough. I felt like she was running away from me because I had that hungry look in my eye.

"Easy sweetheart," I mumbled under my breath, as I ran after her in the dark cavern around the shark tank.

She did elude me and my advances to her pigs in a blanket, only because I got distracted by lamb chops, and she turned a corner back into the crowd. I didn't feel so bad, because I would have probably grabbed an uncomfortable amount in my hand and given her a dirty look.

After some snooping, I found where the caterers emerged from the kitchen. It was where the bathroom was located, so I kept pretending that I was waiting for someone to come out. When they would approach, I'd act shocked like I had no idea, then with the reluctant face of 'I really shouldn't, but youre twisting my arm', I'd give in.

"Yeah, I'll try a chocolate potato roll."

At one point I realized that I was like the 5 year old waiting near the entrance to the field where the players would come out. I would get all excited when the caterer came around the corner, but then have the disappointment when it was codfish balls - just as if the caterer was someone obscure like the third string QB of the team or Al Del Greco.

The hardest part was doing the wine tasting. I would have to figure out a way where I could go to each of the tables without being recognized as "that guy." We started a criss-cross pattern, always stopping to check the wine bottle itself. Looking at each other, we'd shake our heads in affirmation that this was a good one.

Looking at Al with shocked-raised eyebrows, "Ah, its a 98.''
Then looking at the wine attendant, " Mmm, Ill try some of this."

It did get awkward when we started hitting up the tables for the second time, then the third, then the fourth. I was wondering if we should keep the charade going, or just stop pretending. I think we eventually went with the latter and just started pointing at what we wanted with a cute shrug of the shoulders.

As the evening progressed, I did notice that the band was playing Michael Jackson's "Beat It." Upon further inspection, the band leader was wearing dark sunglasses, a black hat, and a white glove. It was too dark to get the photo.

Just to note, there was also the guy who did the swirl, the sniff, and then the taste.

"A little fruity, delicate,....... soft. I like it." Just like me.

ck .