"Take it easy when you go to Boston. I read that you can get something called blood alcoholism. Alcohol poisoning."
ck
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Thursday, August 5, 2010
08-05/Happy August
August is a wonderful month of sweating and sweating. It's important to make sure to drink lots of water and eat as much Burger King as possible. Along with August has come the next entry to the saga of the "Passat Stories."
With a few different problems that are plaguing my car, it has been relinquished to sitting on a second shelf, like a refrigerator at P.C. Richards. A part is on backorder, which led me to the 'loaner.'
I guess in this day and age, loaners don't really exist anymore. They have Enterprise give you a rental car. I was hoping for a different VW to try out, but I guess this is the present.
I needed to get some stuff out of the trunk of my car, otherwise known as a locker room. So after I made them take it down off the rack, I removed a wet baseball uniform, an overnight bag, golf clubs, and a baseball bag.
Enterprise showed up in a sweet silver Kia Rio, and my VW customer service rep commented, " I hope that's not the car they give you." I thought to myself, me too.
Thankfully it wasn't, so we loaded up the Rio to take me to the Enterprise facility where they are going to put together my paperwork. The young gentleman that drove the Rio was very friendly, and must have decided I was hip enough to listen to rap music since he had it on pretty loud. I showed my agreement by nodding my head with the beats to prove to this young man that I was cool.
As we pulled into the shed, donning the sign, "Enterprise." that sat next to the lovely BQE, I was a bit concerned. I thanked the young man for the ride from the dealer, and rapped my way into the shed with my golf clubs and baseball bag.
I was happy I chose to wear the outfit that most resembled a Polo ad, but was even more excited for having golf clubs with me. Super duper.
After Kayne and his girlfriend went, the Jamaican couple went, followed by the other young man who broke the record for saying the 'N' word in a friendly way the most times in ten minutes.
My paperwork was completed and I took my bags outside to my waiting chariot.
A sweet silver Kia Rio.
ck
With a few different problems that are plaguing my car, it has been relinquished to sitting on a second shelf, like a refrigerator at P.C. Richards. A part is on backorder, which led me to the 'loaner.'
I guess in this day and age, loaners don't really exist anymore. They have Enterprise give you a rental car. I was hoping for a different VW to try out, but I guess this is the present.
I needed to get some stuff out of the trunk of my car, otherwise known as a locker room. So after I made them take it down off the rack, I removed a wet baseball uniform, an overnight bag, golf clubs, and a baseball bag.
Enterprise showed up in a sweet silver Kia Rio, and my VW customer service rep commented, " I hope that's not the car they give you." I thought to myself, me too.
Thankfully it wasn't, so we loaded up the Rio to take me to the Enterprise facility where they are going to put together my paperwork. The young gentleman that drove the Rio was very friendly, and must have decided I was hip enough to listen to rap music since he had it on pretty loud. I showed my agreement by nodding my head with the beats to prove to this young man that I was cool.
As we pulled into the shed, donning the sign, "Enterprise." that sat next to the lovely BQE, I was a bit concerned. I thanked the young man for the ride from the dealer, and rapped my way into the shed with my golf clubs and baseball bag.
I was happy I chose to wear the outfit that most resembled a Polo ad, but was even more excited for having golf clubs with me. Super duper.
After Kayne and his girlfriend went, the Jamaican couple went, followed by the other young man who broke the record for saying the 'N' word in a friendly way the most times in ten minutes.
My paperwork was completed and I took my bags outside to my waiting chariot.
A sweet silver Kia Rio.
ck
Friday, July 30, 2010
07-30/Suck Ass Shrink
Did anyone ever know that Sal had a blog named 'Animal Talk?'
http://theanimal13.blogspot.com/
I would have preferred a photo album of Sal with poodles and cockatoos while people commented on them.
I also want to direct you to an older post, and the 27 comments that someone left.
http://cornerbar-cwk.blogspot.com/2010/03/03-18picture-of-week.html
ck
http://theanimal13.blogspot.com/
I would have preferred a photo album of Sal with poodles and cockatoos while people commented on them.
I also want to direct you to an older post, and the 27 comments that someone left.
http://cornerbar-cwk.blogspot.com/2010/03/03-18picture-of-week.html
ck
Thursday, July 29, 2010
07-29/Petite Pettitte
Gentlemen:
This is legit. If you or someone you know is interested.
From: nefertiti jones [mailto:nefertitijones@yahoo.com]
Sent: Wednesday, July 28, 2010 4:11 PM
To: Nefertiti Jones
Subject: Casting a television commercial for AT&T ASAP
Please feel free to pass this on to anyone that fits the bill.
Hey everyone we are casting a super fun job! We are looking for RealTriple AAA, Double AA and Single A or college baseball players for a newAT&T Television Commercial. Any ethnicity.The commercial will feature Nick Swisher and Andy Petite. We are lookingfor legit, semi pro players who can hit a ball thrown by Andy Petite.We are shooting the spot next Thursday August 5th at Staten Island YankeeStadium. This is a SAG job so Sag wages apply. 592.00 for the shoot date,plus residuals every time the commercial airs.If interested please email us two photo's. A close up of your face and afull body shot in your baseball uniform.
Plus a contact number and whatlevel you are at. Please email all info to: nefertitijones@yahoo.comWe will be holding auditions in New York City, this Friday July 30th.The audition will take no more than 10 minutes of your time. Our studio islocated in New York City on West 15th street.
Thank you!
Nef JonesHouse Production
-- TIMOTHY R. HOTT, ESQ.Law Offices of Timothy R. Hott, P.C.591 Summit Avenue - Suite 300Jersey City, NJ 07306Ph: (201) 653-5000 x11Fax: (201) 659-6590If this email relates to a matter in litigation or that may result in litigation and is addressed to a client of the firm named below or any professional retained by such client then it is Attorney Work Product in the context of litigation and is not discoverable and should not be shown to anyone other than the addressee(s).The above email and any attachments to it are sent by Law Offices of Timothy R. Hott, P.C. and is for the intended recipient(s) only and may be confidential and protected by attorney/client privilege. If you are not the intended recipient, please advise the sender immediately. Unauthorized use or distribution is prohibited and may be unlawful.
ck
This is legit. If you or someone you know is interested.
From: nefertiti jones [mailto:nefertitijones@yahoo.com]
Sent: Wednesday, July 28, 2010 4:11 PM
To: Nefertiti Jones
Subject: Casting a television commercial for AT&T ASAP
Please feel free to pass this on to anyone that fits the bill.
Hey everyone we are casting a super fun job! We are looking for RealTriple AAA, Double AA and Single A or college baseball players for a newAT&T Television Commercial. Any ethnicity.The commercial will feature Nick Swisher and Andy Petite. We are lookingfor legit, semi pro players who can hit a ball thrown by Andy Petite.We are shooting the spot next Thursday August 5th at Staten Island YankeeStadium. This is a SAG job so Sag wages apply. 592.00 for the shoot date,plus residuals every time the commercial airs.If interested please email us two photo's. A close up of your face and afull body shot in your baseball uniform.
Plus a contact number and whatlevel you are at. Please email all info to: nefertitijones@yahoo.comWe will be holding auditions in New York City, this Friday July 30th.The audition will take no more than 10 minutes of your time. Our studio islocated in New York City on West 15th street.
Thank you!
Nef JonesHouse Production
-- TIMOTHY R. HOTT, ESQ.Law Offices of Timothy R. Hott, P.C.591 Summit Avenue - Suite 300Jersey City, NJ 07306Ph: (201) 653-5000 x11Fax: (201) 659-6590If this email relates to a matter in litigation or that may result in litigation and is addressed to a client of the firm named below or any professional retained by such client then it is Attorney Work Product in the context of litigation and is not discoverable and should not be shown to anyone other than the addressee(s).The above email and any attachments to it are sent by Law Offices of Timothy R. Hott, P.C. and is for the intended recipient(s) only and may be confidential and protected by attorney/client privilege. If you are not the intended recipient, please advise the sender immediately. Unauthorized use or distribution is prohibited and may be unlawful.
ck
07-29/Can't Catch a Cold
Last night, I enjoyed the company of former co-workers as we went on a sunset cruise with cocktails. Oh, and there just happened to be fishing poles and a chain smoking deckhand that I nicknamed "Mickey."
I had never really believed in fishing in Jamaica Bay, but apparently there are a couple of fishing boats that troll the lovely waters that surround JFK airport. I had fished in this area many times, but never caught anything, and believed that fishing here was just a myth. So, to back that up, I contributed a few dollars to "captain mike's" gas fund, as he aimlessly drove us around the bay, looking at some of the beautiful sights that the Bay has to offer.
In hindsight, I believe that the money would have been more useful to use for gas or food, but the company was good. Plus, I feel good about Keith Hernandez sending me some nice coin from "Cash for Gold."
Captain Mike, showing off his "ode to Hard Knocks Fishermen" tattoo, featuring an anchor with a snake around it, paced around the top deck, shirtless and smoking, confused as to why no one was even getting a nibble. Thankfully, I was nibbling on pieces of a ham/cheese, italian, and liverwurst heros. Nothing is tastier than eating a liverwurst hero with residue of blood worms on your hands.
Cap'n Mike did his best though, following that fish finder to schools of fish that must not have cared at all about a 10 ton fishing boat with a 200 hp engine hovering above them. As we pulled up, I overheard a cocky Fluke saying to his friend,
"Hey bro, I bet that in 5 seconds there's going to be a ton of worms falling from the sky. We should definitely eat them."
Thankfully Mickey reminded us through a cigarette dangling in his mouth that, "When the captain stops the boat you should throw those lines in right away."
Unfortunately, Captain Mike and his Etch-a-sketch fish finder worked to no avail, and we made our last circle around the Marine Park Bridge. Also partying around us was a ghost party ship, that was testing out its disco ball and blue string lights across the top. Good for them.
Mickey's parting words with us as we left the boat not tipping him,
"Fucking guys...."
ck
I had never really believed in fishing in Jamaica Bay, but apparently there are a couple of fishing boats that troll the lovely waters that surround JFK airport. I had fished in this area many times, but never caught anything, and believed that fishing here was just a myth. So, to back that up, I contributed a few dollars to "captain mike's" gas fund, as he aimlessly drove us around the bay, looking at some of the beautiful sights that the Bay has to offer.
In hindsight, I believe that the money would have been more useful to use for gas or food, but the company was good. Plus, I feel good about Keith Hernandez sending me some nice coin from "Cash for Gold."
Captain Mike, showing off his "ode to Hard Knocks Fishermen" tattoo, featuring an anchor with a snake around it, paced around the top deck, shirtless and smoking, confused as to why no one was even getting a nibble. Thankfully, I was nibbling on pieces of a ham/cheese, italian, and liverwurst heros. Nothing is tastier than eating a liverwurst hero with residue of blood worms on your hands.
Cap'n Mike did his best though, following that fish finder to schools of fish that must not have cared at all about a 10 ton fishing boat with a 200 hp engine hovering above them. As we pulled up, I overheard a cocky Fluke saying to his friend,
"Hey bro, I bet that in 5 seconds there's going to be a ton of worms falling from the sky. We should definitely eat them."
Thankfully Mickey reminded us through a cigarette dangling in his mouth that, "When the captain stops the boat you should throw those lines in right away."
Unfortunately, Captain Mike and his Etch-a-sketch fish finder worked to no avail, and we made our last circle around the Marine Park Bridge. Also partying around us was a ghost party ship, that was testing out its disco ball and blue string lights across the top. Good for them.
Mickey's parting words with us as we left the boat not tipping him,
"Fucking guys...."
ck
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
07-27/Pharoah 'Nuff
When I used to work the 4-12 shift, I had a very precise day planned. I would sleep to my content, have a cup of coffee and then go to the gym. After working out and sweating out the pork products I inhaled in the previous night shift, I would come home and eat a nice protein laden meal. This equation created the lean, mean, fighting machine that you see today.
A fun part of this day would be enjoying my eggs while watching 2 full hours of 'Las Vegas.' TNT, who "knows drama," has been able to supply me with this mid day glutony for over 5 years now. "The Burning Bedouin," features the hilarious Sandra Berhard, who plays the Deline's houskeeper, and the only one the knows that Big Ed has hurt his back from playing 36 holes of golf! Hilarity ensues when the outrageous Berhard uses all her "funny" to annoy Big Ed while she cleans the house.
My days are still the same, however now I don't go to work, I don't go to the gym, and I eat the pork products during 'Las Vegas.'
From Wikipedia
Polly, (2005–2008), (Suzanne Whang), a Korean manicurist in the Montecito's spa, who has recently formed a friendship with A.J. Cooper. Polly is always open about discussing her sexual experience, such as claiming she was one of Wilt Chamberlain's 20,000 partners in "2 on 2." Sam once gave Ed a full body massage from Polly for Christmas, in which Polly attempted to give Ed a 'happy ending'.
ck
A fun part of this day would be enjoying my eggs while watching 2 full hours of 'Las Vegas.' TNT, who "knows drama," has been able to supply me with this mid day glutony for over 5 years now. "The Burning Bedouin," features the hilarious Sandra Berhard, who plays the Deline's houskeeper, and the only one the knows that Big Ed has hurt his back from playing 36 holes of golf! Hilarity ensues when the outrageous Berhard uses all her "funny" to annoy Big Ed while she cleans the house.
My days are still the same, however now I don't go to work, I don't go to the gym, and I eat the pork products during 'Las Vegas.'
From Wikipedia
Polly, (2005–2008), (Suzanne Whang), a Korean manicurist in the Montecito's spa, who has recently formed a friendship with A.J. Cooper. Polly is always open about discussing her sexual experience, such as claiming she was one of Wilt Chamberlain's 20,000 partners in "2 on 2." Sam once gave Ed a full body massage from Polly for Christmas, in which Polly attempted to give Ed a 'happy ending'.
Thanks to the Kemmerer Consumer Guidelines, the family enacted upon number 47, "Complain about random things to get free stuff." Most of this is based on my father's infatuation with the HBO series, "Hung." Now we get free HBO and Cinemax, so I can enjoy watching 500 Days of Summer every day.
TOM What's different now? How could things change so quickly?
SUMMER I don't know. It just happened.
TOM What happened?! That's what I don't get.
SUMMER I... Tom...
TOM What, tell me...
SUMMER I woke up one day and I knew. (Tom says nothing.)
SUMMER I knew I could promise him I'd feel the same way every morning. In a way that I... I never could with you.
ck
Thursday, March 18, 2010
03-18/It's All Greek to Me
I recently have been very proud of my attempts to go back to school for further education to receive my MBA. Sticking with my Alma mater, I am back in Embry-Riddle and am in a MBA program designed for Aviation.
The first course was in marketing, and it started off pretty promising. We talked a little about airlines and their commercials, and debated certain marketing philosophies over an online discussion board. Great.
The next few week's assignments, went something like this.
2.) "Take a look at amazon.com and...."
3.) "For example, Apple has....."
4.) "Take a look at amazon.com
Ok, we got it. Apple markets stuff. Cool. Amazon has a very good website. Great. Rinse and repeat for 6 more weeks.
I limped my way through the class being very successful as a fake. I figured I could get used to this as long as it stayed this easy.
All excited about my ability to bullshit and to do 95 percent of my homework at work, this term's class is operations research. It is basically all about using Prob and Stats and applying it to the business world. Hmmm....
Week 1 consisted of my sister and her boyfriend doing my homework and online quiz. This week's discussion is using information from a problem to figure out the decision tree, gather the probabilities and decide whether or not some asshole should bid on something or other.
This is actually the homework.
雜誌是一座橋樑
身在資訊流通快速，瞬息萬變的世界裡，我們需要更精準地掌握時代脈動，以及了解全球潮流動向。雜誌為我們打開觀察世界的窗口，提供來自全球各地訊息，包括財經、設計，時尚，娛樂，以及藝術…等等。
進步的動力來自進步的觀念。雜誌像一座橋樑，將我們與最先進的觀念聯結接軌，並且化為進步的動力。
時間過得飛快，2009年又即將邁入尾聲，而在迎接2010年到來的同時，為了讓自己比任何人都更早嗅到潮流的起源，請你作好萬全準備，期待新年度到來。
The first course was in marketing, and it started off pretty promising. We talked a little about airlines and their commercials, and debated certain marketing philosophies over an online discussion board. Great.
The next few week's assignments, went something like this.
2.) "Take a look at amazon.com and...."
3.) "For example, Apple has....."
4.) "Take a look at amazon.com
Ok, we got it. Apple markets stuff. Cool. Amazon has a very good website. Great. Rinse and repeat for 6 more weeks.
I limped my way through the class being very successful as a fake. I figured I could get used to this as long as it stayed this easy.
All excited about my ability to bullshit and to do 95 percent of my homework at work, this term's class is operations research. It is basically all about using Prob and Stats and applying it to the business world. Hmmm....
Week 1 consisted of my sister and her boyfriend doing my homework and online quiz. This week's discussion is using information from a problem to figure out the decision tree, gather the probabilities and decide whether or not some asshole should bid on something or other.
This is actually the homework.
雜誌是一座橋樑
身在資訊流通快速，瞬息萬變的世界裡，我們需要更精準地掌握時代脈動，以及了解全球潮流動向。雜誌為我們打開觀察世界的窗口，提供來自全球各地訊息，包括財經、設計，時尚，娛樂，以及藝術…等等。
進步的動力來自進步的觀念。雜誌像一座橋樑，將我們與最先進的觀念聯結接軌，並且化為進步的動力。
時間過得飛快，2009年又即將邁入尾聲，而在迎接2010年到來的同時，為了讓自己比任何人都更早嗅到潮流的起源，請你作好萬全準備，期待新年度到來。
ck
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
02-09/Picture of the Week
Fun with Photoshop - by C Dools.
There probably is an inside joke about this that I don't know - I'm sure I deserve it, I always do.
ck
Thursday, February 4, 2010
02-04/Flesh Eating Animals
This is why you will only spot me without a shirt on once a year; bathing myself in an East Hamptons Pool to the disdain of fellow guests.
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2010/02/04/2010-02-04_day_after_fatal_shark_swarm_attack_on_surfer_off_florida_coast_more_than_100_dor.html
funny comment by someone who posted...
Mind Your Business
11:33:03 AMFeb 4, 2010
So does someone talk to the shark and say "Why did you bite that person?" and the shark responds, "Oh my bad, I thought he was a fish." How do they know that?
ck
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2010/02/04/2010-02-04_day_after_fatal_shark_swarm_attack_on_surfer_off_florida_coast_more_than_100_dor.html
funny comment by someone who posted...
Mind Your Business
11:33:03 AMFeb 4, 2010
So does someone talk to the shark and say "Why did you bite that person?" and the shark responds, "Oh my bad, I thought he was a fish." How do they know that?
ck
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
02-03/The Life of a DB
While removing snow from my car this morning, a neighbor of mine was shoveling outside of his house. I diligently went about my way, and wasn't sure if I would have to engage in a conversation with him.
He is a nice guy, one of the people on the block that you have to wave to - and along with his wife, will stop the car and stare at you until you see them and wave - or stand on the porch before they will go inside until you see them and wave.
So I waited and stared, but he shoveled along. I went back to cleaning the car. I stared again, he kept on shoveling. I went back to cleaning the car. Then I figured I better just stare until he sees me. So I did.
"Hi, Chris," he said in his unexcited tone.
"Hey, there," I responded, still not knowing his name. I had filled in on a softball team that he played on quite a few times, and most notably I knew him for 15 years. Still I couldn't remember his name.
Apparently I had originally not looked forward to this confrontation, however I stood there looking for something to say. He made it clear that he was quite content with the interaction, but I seemed to want to say more.
I was about to say something about how I was looking forward to going to Florida tomorrow. "Yeah, this snow - can't wait to get out of it for a few days - hah huh hah huh...." was what I almost said. I stopped and realized that I was an old man (almost), and that also this was a classic DB statement.
What's the point of telling someone that is 90 percent probably not going to Florida tomorrow, that I was? You might as well say, "F8CK YOU, IM GOING TO FLORIDA!!" or something similar that Ashy Larry would say from The Chappelle Show.
I stopped and realized I was a DB for even thinking it, meanwhile it was just to make conversation. I guess we all do it a bit, but I think I may have been a DB in the past.
No longer friends, I'll stick to being a DB in other ways.
ck
He is a nice guy, one of the people on the block that you have to wave to - and along with his wife, will stop the car and stare at you until you see them and wave - or stand on the porch before they will go inside until you see them and wave.
So I waited and stared, but he shoveled along. I went back to cleaning the car. I stared again, he kept on shoveling. I went back to cleaning the car. Then I figured I better just stare until he sees me. So I did.
"Hi, Chris," he said in his unexcited tone.
"Hey, there," I responded, still not knowing his name. I had filled in on a softball team that he played on quite a few times, and most notably I knew him for 15 years. Still I couldn't remember his name.
Apparently I had originally not looked forward to this confrontation, however I stood there looking for something to say. He made it clear that he was quite content with the interaction, but I seemed to want to say more.
I was about to say something about how I was looking forward to going to Florida tomorrow. "Yeah, this snow - can't wait to get out of it for a few days - hah huh hah huh...." was what I almost said. I stopped and realized that I was an old man (almost), and that also this was a classic DB statement.
What's the point of telling someone that is 90 percent probably not going to Florida tomorrow, that I was? You might as well say, "F8CK YOU, IM GOING TO FLORIDA!!" or something similar that Ashy Larry would say from The Chappelle Show.
I stopped and realized I was a DB for even thinking it, meanwhile it was just to make conversation. I guess we all do it a bit, but I think I may have been a DB in the past.
No longer friends, I'll stick to being a DB in other ways.
ck
Monday, February 1, 2010
02-01/The Nexus of the Universe
Now that January and the "holidays" are over, it's alot easier to get back to making fun of people again. I could have just written about myself instead to fill the gap, but I was still waiting for approval to go to the bathroom. It all goes back to what RR taught us "Nobody Cares." Hopefully we all remember that sometimes this applies to ourself.
Thanks to all who joined Phil's "Return to Rera's" Weekend. As it was 20 degrees outside, it was a steamy 100 inside, as all the major players of drama came barreling, or surfing in.
"Dude. what's up?"
"Not much Dude."
"Is that your board man?"
"Yeah man. Dude, it's sweet"
"I bet"
Here were some of the awards given out. Some took home more than one award, and some shared awards.
"On his best behavior with a nice midwestern smile"
"Longest awkward stare at ex"
"Wearing the complete and total opposite of the whole bar"
"Still tall and duf-fy"
"Wishes he knew Phil in College"
"Best exit while realizing the situation"
"Pretend to want to meet her friends as long as he gets laid"
"Cutest and Cuddliest koala lawyer"
"Best disappearing act"
"Best supporting disappearing act"
"Longest continuing thought about what he's going to eat after this"
"Best hide from a stalker"
ck
Thanks to all who joined Phil's "Return to Rera's" Weekend. As it was 20 degrees outside, it was a steamy 100 inside, as all the major players of drama came barreling, or surfing in.
"Dude. what's up?"
"Not much Dude."
"Is that your board man?"
"Yeah man. Dude, it's sweet"
"I bet"
Here were some of the awards given out. Some took home more than one award, and some shared awards.
"On his best behavior with a nice midwestern smile"
"Longest awkward stare at ex"
"Wearing the complete and total opposite of the whole bar"
"Still tall and duf-fy"
"Wishes he knew Phil in College"
"Best exit while realizing the situation"
"Pretend to want to meet her friends as long as he gets laid"
"Cutest and Cuddliest koala lawyer"
"Best disappearing act"
"Best supporting disappearing act"
"Longest continuing thought about what he's going to eat after this"
"Best hide from a stalker"
ck
Friday, January 8, 2010
01-08/Drive me Crazy
As my Egg McMuffin exploded onto my pants, grease flying in pornographic fashion, I wondered a few things. First, why is this terrible Egg McMuffin "juicy?" and also, will my Tide to Go pen work on this unholy McDonald's flavor concoction?
I can tell you that the Tide to Go pen was no match for the sensual stream of grease stains leading from my knee up to my crotch, and it will be an interesting day at work trying to find ways to hide my weiner-area from everyone. Perhaps people will assume I have a boner all day. www.awkwardboner.com
If I had swerved, or reacted carelessly when that McMuffin juice went flying all over my leg while driving, I wondered if I could have gotten into a wreck. A good cup of coffee, the proponent for my stop at McD's today, is usually what will get me into trouble. The coffee was quite cool today, though, and easy to drink.
It was the damn drive through devil that tricked me into getting that number one..
ME: " large coffee, little bit of milk"
HER: "anything else?"
ME: " FINE. A number 1"
You can see how she twisted my arm with her psychological tricks, undoubtedly taught to her by those mind-merlins at McDonalds U.
ck
I can tell you that the Tide to Go pen was no match for the sensual stream of grease stains leading from my knee up to my crotch, and it will be an interesting day at work trying to find ways to hide my weiner-area from everyone. Perhaps people will assume I have a boner all day. www.awkwardboner.com
If I had swerved, or reacted carelessly when that McMuffin juice went flying all over my leg while driving, I wondered if I could have gotten into a wreck. A good cup of coffee, the proponent for my stop at McD's today, is usually what will get me into trouble. The coffee was quite cool today, though, and easy to drink.
It was the damn drive through devil that tricked me into getting that number one..
ME: " large coffee, little bit of milk"
HER: "anything else?"
ME: " FINE. A number 1"
You can see how she twisted my arm with her psychological tricks, undoubtedly taught to her by those mind-merlins at McDonalds U.
ck
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Monday, January 4, 2010
01-04/"Oh no! Whatever all shall we do??"
Economy killed First Edition’s business: Owner
By Nathan Duke
A 50-year-old Flushing line cook is facing a tough job market after First Edition Bistro, a longtime Bell Boulevard bar and restaurant where he had worked since the early 1990s, shut down earlier this month after 61 years because the struggling economy had caused business to decline.
61 years? really? Struggling economy? Perhaps had something to do with playing Hootie and Blowfish videos with no sound.
Lorenzo Castillo, who worked as a line cook at Bayside’s First Edition, said he was having difficulty finding work after losing his job last week.
Resume - Best known for putting frozen pizzas in an oven and timing when it was completely thawed, and serving a boneless chicken breast with cheese in a wrap to two large men who rode in on little motor scooters.
"I’ve worked here for 17 years,” he said Tuesday as he helped clean out the restaurant. “Now, I’m looking for something to do. I have credit card bills to pay. I have no job and it’s almost Christmas. I’ve been looking for work, but no one is hiring right now.”
A bag with a Jeff Beukeboom photo, a polo mallet, some stale potato chips, and 15 6 inch TVs were left outside for the trash. At the end of the day, 14 6 inch TVs remained.
Rick Ritacco, who co-owned the eatery with his brother, Robert Ritacco, and sister, Margie Mercado, said the restaurant had been founded at 41-08 Bell Blvd. in 1948 by his father, Angelo Ritacco, and grandfather, James Pascale. On Dec. 7, First Edition closed its doors permanently.
In 1948 there was a high demand for overpriced soda pops and bartenders that gave handy's. That was like going all the way back then.
"The business over the last two years had taken a hit,” Ritacco said. “We didn’t believe an investment would pay off. Last week was very sad. It was like a death. I’ll miss Bayside. When you’ve been here so long, you become part of the community.”
Other businesses were asked how the economy has affected them.
" No problems, weekends still pretty packed. That place sucked." - Bourbon Street.
" Tons of people still hanging out here from St. Francis Prep. I only used to see a short stocky kid with a mets shirt, a skinny kid with sweatpants and sideways hat, and two large guys holding hands go in that shithole. Oh and once a while a guy that looked like Artie Bucco with a suit." - Sullivans
" What is First Editions? " - Monihans
" Business has picked up since our renovation and we moved into the 21st century " - Donovans
The bistro, which was next to Bell Boulevard’s Long Island Rail Road station, served hamburgers, pizza, wraps, pasta, salads, all-day breakfast and fish, but it was known best for its hot wings. First Edition also had seven big-screen televisions and 70 smaller TVs, which drew sports fans to the bar to watch football, Yankees and Mets games.
Big Screen = 24 inch TVs that weighed 70 pounds bolted onto the ceiling. Lots of sports fans who watched games, and took home a certain bartender.
Oh - all day breakfast? Really?
First Edition, which had a dedicated local customer base, served food late into the night and often featured drink specials throughout the week.
Top Special - Wednesday night from 4p to 5p, 4 dollar Coors Light Draughts that smelled like pee.
But boxes packed with kitchen equipment were stacked inside the restaurant this week as its employees helped put a footnote to a vanished era.
"It was a very popular place to come to after 10 p.m. for half-price specials,” Ritacco said. “People would come at 1 or 2 a.m. for a bite to eat and a cocktail.”
Cocktail? Lets not go crazy here. Drunk people that were off Tuesday Wednesdays went there.
Ritacco, who had previously headed the Bayside Kiwanis Club and been a member of the Bayside Business Association, said the economic downturn as well as a demographic change in Bayside ultimately led to First Edition’s closure. Now, the restaurateur has opened a new hot wings site called Wings Plus in Port Washington, L.I.
What demographic, is Mark Chinese?
But he said more than 20 employees lost their jobs after his Bell Boulevard business was shuttered. Ritacco was only able to take one cook with him to his new site, which is significantly smaller than First Edition and focuses primarily on take-out orders.
Grand opening special....10 wings for 5 dollars and a 6 inch TV.
A sign that thanked First Edition’s customers was posted in the restaurant’s window last week.
It read, “After serving the Bayside community for the past 61 years, First Edition has been forced to close our doors due to declining business brought on by the economic conditions of the past year.”
It really read : Mark/Steve thanks for the money we made off Quick Draw.
ck/fc
Fabian found the article at :
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/queens/economy_killed_first_edition_business_FHUOLIxwZwTZ6ZiNZdjuYM
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