Beep Beep Dude Dude

Original:Friday, April 28, 2006
Beep beep dude dude
My place of work is out on Long Island, about 45 miles from my home base. Since I have this long commute, I've dealt with lots of driving issues, like eating and driving, dipping and driving, watching out for crazy drivers, watching crazy drivers. When you are in a car that long, you discover yourself.
People sometimes get a little crazy on the road though. Sometimes I am in a rush and I'll get all crazy with them. Sometimes I'm not all the crazy and just like to sit with the cruise control on and listen to my melodies or talk radio. I have always wanted to get into a talk radio show where I could say "You go girl" and really mean it.
There have been certain situations though where people get crazy and they start to annoy me. So your friend here now has a dangerous but really spiteful move for those that pass me.
Now you have to be sure that the car behind you is going to want to do the annoyed lookover, that so many of us do ourselves. You know, that move similar to the half turn or full turn at a restaraunt or movie theater you give to annoying people. So if you have any thought that you are going to get this move done to you - here's what I have done.
When the car is accelerating past you, keep your eyes on the road until you see the car come up next to you. Then lay your head on your right shoulder and pretend that you are sleeping ( make sure you are watching the road ). So that when the person is going to give you the half turn or full turn annoyed look, the person will be shocked to discover that you are asleep!
You can not really enjoy the person's reaction because you are facing away from them doing this charade. So you can just imagine this and get a real kick out of the possible thoughts that are going through the person's head.
Sometimes if I am feeling saucy I will time it perfectly to be resting my head with eyes closed facing the car passing me. I hope its usually an ornery old person who has no business being on the road at all.
I dont recommend doing any of these things as they are extremely dangerous. But here's some more.
I'll steer the car with my knees and have my arms folded looking like i"m thinking.
I'll steer the car with my knees and be eating something with both hands and offer some to the passing car.
Ill have a book in my hands and laugh shaking my head.
I just like to mess with people before they mess with me.
Don't do any of these things.

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