"Take it easy when you go to Boston. I read that you can get something called blood alcoholism. Alcohol poisoning."
ck
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Thursday, August 5, 2010
08-05/Happy August
August is a wonderful month of sweating and sweating. It's important to make sure to drink lots of water and eat as much Burger King as possible. Along with August has come the next entry to the saga of the "Passat Stories."
With a few different problems that are plaguing my car, it has been relinquished to sitting on a second shelf, like a refrigerator at P.C. Richards. A part is on backorder, which led me to the 'loaner.'
I guess in this day and age, loaners don't really exist anymore. They have Enterprise give you a rental car. I was hoping for a different VW to try out, but I guess this is the present.
I needed to get some stuff out of the trunk of my car, otherwise known as a locker room. So after I made them take it down off the rack, I removed a wet baseball uniform, an overnight bag, golf clubs, and a baseball bag.
Enterprise showed up in a sweet silver Kia Rio, and my VW customer service rep commented, " I hope that's not the car they give you." I thought to myself, me too.
Thankfully it wasn't, so we loaded up the Rio to take me to the Enterprise facility where they are going to put together my paperwork. The young gentleman that drove the Rio was very friendly, and must have decided I was hip enough to listen to rap music since he had it on pretty loud. I showed my agreement by nodding my head with the beats to prove to this young man that I was cool.
As we pulled into the shed, donning the sign, "Enterprise." that sat next to the lovely BQE, I was a bit concerned. I thanked the young man for the ride from the dealer, and rapped my way into the shed with my golf clubs and baseball bag.
I was happy I chose to wear the outfit that most resembled a Polo ad, but was even more excited for having golf clubs with me. Super duper.
After Kayne and his girlfriend went, the Jamaican couple went, followed by the other young man who broke the record for saying the 'N' word in a friendly way the most times in ten minutes.
My paperwork was completed and I took my bags outside to my waiting chariot.
A sweet silver Kia Rio.
ck
With a few different problems that are plaguing my car, it has been relinquished to sitting on a second shelf, like a refrigerator at P.C. Richards. A part is on backorder, which led me to the 'loaner.'
I guess in this day and age, loaners don't really exist anymore. They have Enterprise give you a rental car. I was hoping for a different VW to try out, but I guess this is the present.
I needed to get some stuff out of the trunk of my car, otherwise known as a locker room. So after I made them take it down off the rack, I removed a wet baseball uniform, an overnight bag, golf clubs, and a baseball bag.
Enterprise showed up in a sweet silver Kia Rio, and my VW customer service rep commented, " I hope that's not the car they give you." I thought to myself, me too.
Thankfully it wasn't, so we loaded up the Rio to take me to the Enterprise facility where they are going to put together my paperwork. The young gentleman that drove the Rio was very friendly, and must have decided I was hip enough to listen to rap music since he had it on pretty loud. I showed my agreement by nodding my head with the beats to prove to this young man that I was cool.
As we pulled into the shed, donning the sign, "Enterprise." that sat next to the lovely BQE, I was a bit concerned. I thanked the young man for the ride from the dealer, and rapped my way into the shed with my golf clubs and baseball bag.
I was happy I chose to wear the outfit that most resembled a Polo ad, but was even more excited for having golf clubs with me. Super duper.
After Kayne and his girlfriend went, the Jamaican couple went, followed by the other young man who broke the record for saying the 'N' word in a friendly way the most times in ten minutes.
My paperwork was completed and I took my bags outside to my waiting chariot.
A sweet silver Kia Rio.
ck
Friday, July 30, 2010
07-30/Suck Ass Shrink
Did anyone ever know that Sal had a blog named 'Animal Talk?'
http://theanimal13.blogspot.com/
I would have preferred a photo album of Sal with poodles and cockatoos while people commented on them.
I also want to direct you to an older post, and the 27 comments that someone left.
http://cornerbar-cwk.blogspot.com/2010/03/03-18picture-of-week.html
ck
http://theanimal13.blogspot.com/
I would have preferred a photo album of Sal with poodles and cockatoos while people commented on them.
I also want to direct you to an older post, and the 27 comments that someone left.
http://cornerbar-cwk.blogspot.com/2010/03/03-18picture-of-week.html
ck
Thursday, July 29, 2010
07-29/Petite Pettitte
Gentlemen:
This is legit. If you or someone you know is interested.
From: nefertiti jones [mailto:nefertitijones@yahoo.com]
Sent: Wednesday, July 28, 2010 4:11 PM
To: Nefertiti Jones
Subject: Casting a television commercial for AT&T ASAP
Please feel free to pass this on to anyone that fits the bill.
Hey everyone we are casting a super fun job! We are looking for RealTriple AAA, Double AA and Single A or college baseball players for a newAT&T Television Commercial. Any ethnicity.The commercial will feature Nick Swisher and Andy Petite. We are lookingfor legit, semi pro players who can hit a ball thrown by Andy Petite.We are shooting the spot next Thursday August 5th at Staten Island YankeeStadium. This is a SAG job so Sag wages apply. 592.00 for the shoot date,plus residuals every time the commercial airs.If interested please email us two photo's. A close up of your face and afull body shot in your baseball uniform.
Plus a contact number and whatlevel you are at. Please email all info to: nefertitijones@yahoo.comWe will be holding auditions in New York City, this Friday July 30th.The audition will take no more than 10 minutes of your time. Our studio islocated in New York City on West 15th street.
Thank you!
Nef JonesHouse Production
-- TIMOTHY R. HOTT, ESQ.Law Offices of Timothy R. Hott, P.C.591 Summit Avenue - Suite 300Jersey City, NJ 07306Ph: (201) 653-5000 x11Fax: (201) 659-6590If this email relates to a matter in litigation or that may result in litigation and is addressed to a client of the firm named below or any professional retained by such client then it is Attorney Work Product in the context of litigation and is not discoverable and should not be shown to anyone other than the addressee(s).The above email and any attachments to it are sent by Law Offices of Timothy R. Hott, P.C. and is for the intended recipient(s) only and may be confidential and protected by attorney/client privilege. If you are not the intended recipient, please advise the sender immediately. Unauthorized use or distribution is prohibited and may be unlawful.
ck
This is legit. If you or someone you know is interested.
From: nefertiti jones [mailto:nefertitijones@yahoo.com]
Sent: Wednesday, July 28, 2010 4:11 PM
To: Nefertiti Jones
Subject: Casting a television commercial for AT&T ASAP
Please feel free to pass this on to anyone that fits the bill.
Hey everyone we are casting a super fun job! We are looking for RealTriple AAA, Double AA and Single A or college baseball players for a newAT&T Television Commercial. Any ethnicity.The commercial will feature Nick Swisher and Andy Petite. We are lookingfor legit, semi pro players who can hit a ball thrown by Andy Petite.We are shooting the spot next Thursday August 5th at Staten Island YankeeStadium. This is a SAG job so Sag wages apply. 592.00 for the shoot date,plus residuals every time the commercial airs.If interested please email us two photo's. A close up of your face and afull body shot in your baseball uniform.
Plus a contact number and whatlevel you are at. Please email all info to: nefertitijones@yahoo.comWe will be holding auditions in New York City, this Friday July 30th.The audition will take no more than 10 minutes of your time. Our studio islocated in New York City on West 15th street.
Thank you!
Nef JonesHouse Production
-- TIMOTHY R. HOTT, ESQ.Law Offices of Timothy R. Hott, P.C.591 Summit Avenue - Suite 300Jersey City, NJ 07306Ph: (201) 653-5000 x11Fax: (201) 659-6590If this email relates to a matter in litigation or that may result in litigation and is addressed to a client of the firm named below or any professional retained by such client then it is Attorney Work Product in the context of litigation and is not discoverable and should not be shown to anyone other than the addressee(s).The above email and any attachments to it are sent by Law Offices of Timothy R. Hott, P.C. and is for the intended recipient(s) only and may be confidential and protected by attorney/client privilege. If you are not the intended recipient, please advise the sender immediately. Unauthorized use or distribution is prohibited and may be unlawful.
ck
07-29/Can't Catch a Cold
Last night, I enjoyed the company of former co-workers as we went on a sunset cruise with cocktails. Oh, and there just happened to be fishing poles and a chain smoking deckhand that I nicknamed "Mickey."
I had never really believed in fishing in Jamaica Bay, but apparently there are a couple of fishing boats that troll the lovely waters that surround JFK airport. I had fished in this area many times, but never caught anything, and believed that fishing here was just a myth. So, to back that up, I contributed a few dollars to "captain mike's" gas fund, as he aimlessly drove us around the bay, looking at some of the beautiful sights that the Bay has to offer.
In hindsight, I believe that the money would have been more useful to use for gas or food, but the company was good. Plus, I feel good about Keith Hernandez sending me some nice coin from "Cash for Gold."
Captain Mike, showing off his "ode to Hard Knocks Fishermen" tattoo, featuring an anchor with a snake around it, paced around the top deck, shirtless and smoking, confused as to why no one was even getting a nibble. Thankfully, I was nibbling on pieces of a ham/cheese, italian, and liverwurst heros. Nothing is tastier than eating a liverwurst hero with residue of blood worms on your hands.
Cap'n Mike did his best though, following that fish finder to schools of fish that must not have cared at all about a 10 ton fishing boat with a 200 hp engine hovering above them. As we pulled up, I overheard a cocky Fluke saying to his friend,
"Hey bro, I bet that in 5 seconds there's going to be a ton of worms falling from the sky. We should definitely eat them."
Thankfully Mickey reminded us through a cigarette dangling in his mouth that, "When the captain stops the boat you should throw those lines in right away."
Unfortunately, Captain Mike and his Etch-a-sketch fish finder worked to no avail, and we made our last circle around the Marine Park Bridge. Also partying around us was a ghost party ship, that was testing out its disco ball and blue string lights across the top. Good for them.
Mickey's parting words with us as we left the boat not tipping him,
"Fucking guys...."
ck
I had never really believed in fishing in Jamaica Bay, but apparently there are a couple of fishing boats that troll the lovely waters that surround JFK airport. I had fished in this area many times, but never caught anything, and believed that fishing here was just a myth. So, to back that up, I contributed a few dollars to "captain mike's" gas fund, as he aimlessly drove us around the bay, looking at some of the beautiful sights that the Bay has to offer.
In hindsight, I believe that the money would have been more useful to use for gas or food, but the company was good. Plus, I feel good about Keith Hernandez sending me some nice coin from "Cash for Gold."
Captain Mike, showing off his "ode to Hard Knocks Fishermen" tattoo, featuring an anchor with a snake around it, paced around the top deck, shirtless and smoking, confused as to why no one was even getting a nibble. Thankfully, I was nibbling on pieces of a ham/cheese, italian, and liverwurst heros. Nothing is tastier than eating a liverwurst hero with residue of blood worms on your hands.
Cap'n Mike did his best though, following that fish finder to schools of fish that must not have cared at all about a 10 ton fishing boat with a 200 hp engine hovering above them. As we pulled up, I overheard a cocky Fluke saying to his friend,
"Hey bro, I bet that in 5 seconds there's going to be a ton of worms falling from the sky. We should definitely eat them."
Thankfully Mickey reminded us through a cigarette dangling in his mouth that, "When the captain stops the boat you should throw those lines in right away."
Unfortunately, Captain Mike and his Etch-a-sketch fish finder worked to no avail, and we made our last circle around the Marine Park Bridge. Also partying around us was a ghost party ship, that was testing out its disco ball and blue string lights across the top. Good for them.
Mickey's parting words with us as we left the boat not tipping him,
"Fucking guys...."
ck
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
07-27/Pharoah 'Nuff
When I used to work the 4-12 shift, I had a very precise day planned. I would sleep to my content, have a cup of coffee and then go to the gym. After working out and sweating out the pork products I inhaled in the previous night shift, I would come home and eat a nice protein laden meal. This equation created the lean, mean, fighting machine that you see today.
A fun part of this day would be enjoying my eggs while watching 2 full hours of 'Las Vegas.' TNT, who "knows drama," has been able to supply me with this mid day glutony for over 5 years now. "The Burning Bedouin," features the hilarious Sandra Berhard, who plays the Deline's houskeeper, and the only one the knows that Big Ed has hurt his back from playing 36 holes of golf! Hilarity ensues when the outrageous Berhard uses all her "funny" to annoy Big Ed while she cleans the house.
My days are still the same, however now I don't go to work, I don't go to the gym, and I eat the pork products during 'Las Vegas.'
From Wikipedia
Polly, (2005–2008), (Suzanne Whang), a Korean manicurist in the Montecito's spa, who has recently formed a friendship with A.J. Cooper. Polly is always open about discussing her sexual experience, such as claiming she was one of Wilt Chamberlain's 20,000 partners in "2 on 2." Sam once gave Ed a full body massage from Polly for Christmas, in which Polly attempted to give Ed a 'happy ending'.
ck
A fun part of this day would be enjoying my eggs while watching 2 full hours of 'Las Vegas.' TNT, who "knows drama," has been able to supply me with this mid day glutony for over 5 years now. "The Burning Bedouin," features the hilarious Sandra Berhard, who plays the Deline's houskeeper, and the only one the knows that Big Ed has hurt his back from playing 36 holes of golf! Hilarity ensues when the outrageous Berhard uses all her "funny" to annoy Big Ed while she cleans the house.
My days are still the same, however now I don't go to work, I don't go to the gym, and I eat the pork products during 'Las Vegas.'
From Wikipedia
Polly, (2005–2008), (Suzanne Whang), a Korean manicurist in the Montecito's spa, who has recently formed a friendship with A.J. Cooper. Polly is always open about discussing her sexual experience, such as claiming she was one of Wilt Chamberlain's 20,000 partners in "2 on 2." Sam once gave Ed a full body massage from Polly for Christmas, in which Polly attempted to give Ed a 'happy ending'.
Thanks to the Kemmerer Consumer Guidelines, the family enacted upon number 47, "Complain about random things to get free stuff." Most of this is based on my father's infatuation with the HBO series, "Hung." Now we get free HBO and Cinemax, so I can enjoy watching 500 Days of Summer every day.
TOM What's different now? How could things change so quickly?
SUMMER I don't know. It just happened.
TOM What happened?! That's what I don't get.
SUMMER I... Tom...
TOM What, tell me...
SUMMER I woke up one day and I knew. (Tom says nothing.)
SUMMER I knew I could promise him I'd feel the same way every morning. In a way that I... I never could with you.
ck
Thursday, March 18, 2010
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